A Down Day
Have you ever had one of those days where you just didn't feel like going to work...and so you didn't go? ...no great illness, a bit of a headache in your forehead, a bit of a feeling in your stomach...you could work through it, you have many times before. I battled these feelings this morning from the moment I awoke. I hadn't slept well again (hard time getting back to sleep after awaking in the night for some reason), but I fought through it and got myself up and into the shower. 'There's nothing wrong with me,' I reasoned, 'I need to get ready for work'. I kept battling these thoughts as I dried my hair and so on, and then the thought came over me again, 'I could just stay home for a day...take a banked day...sure I'm not sick sick, but I just don't feel well...the tylenol hasn't worked yet...I should stay home...' Then the thought went through my mind of whether that would disappoint God, so I asked Him what He thought, and I didn't seem to get a direct answer. I decided, 'I better go to work,' and I continued to get ready, but to no avail, the thoughts came back again, and this time I let them win. 'I need a down day,' I reasoned, 'I'm always running.' So I called in, told my boss I just wasn't feeling great today and that I'd take a bank day. It went fine, but there still is this small pit of guilt I feel. Did I disappoint God by doing that? Did I disappoint those I care about, by just needing today? I hope not. Today I just need to take care of me a bit, so I'm off to camp out on the couch with my Bible, my journal and maybe a devotional, trusting that God will fill me up with whatever it is I need.